" I Really Need A Break From All Of These... "

I went out with Claire last night.

Last time we saw each other was on Christmas day. So, I was really glad to see her and to be with her again. It's really different having her around. We had dinner, went to NET to shop, i actually bought a shirt, skirt and a long black socks. Then we went to have coffee!! That's the best part of it. Cause we get to sit down, talk about what happened for the past few weeks, and we even talked about things from Bible, we shared our opinions. How we are doing in church, our spiritual life, how we are learning each day and from different people.

And I get to say everything to her. I mean, "E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G".

My problem not going to graduate this year, my fear how will I tell such a thing to my Mom, my doubts if this is the right thing to do. There's a lot of things going in my mind right now, really. I'm thinking hard these days what is my next step. Should I be really doing this? or should I not? I'm praying & really clinging on Him, that He would show me a sign, show me where He wants me to walk, I'm giving all on Him to lead me the way. I'm even giving the wheel of my life to Him... It's just so exhausted you know, I really can not do this alone. I need God in my life, I need Him to lead me the way, to make the decision for me.

Do I finish my studies? (but that would mean, i need to change school and course as well--I'd love to change course; And more years to study AGAIN! --that sucks! $%^&%$$&*&^!)

But If I don't finish my school, My Mom would be sad, and so disappointed. And I don't want letting her down. It's just there are circumstances that I can't avoid. Circumstances that making things worse. Circumstances just keep letting me down. No matter how hard I tried pushing, how many times I prayed, It's just not working. I must admit, when those kind of circumstances happened, I really did wondered why is it all happening to me, why is it hard to finish my studies for me, why do I keep on bumping to these "hard-and-not-so-easy-to-move-rocks". I don't understand why is it all happening to me. Those days that I would wonder and cry at night. It was hard for me to accept some things, but I'm praying and believing that there must be something more for me. I'm just gonna keep on "P.U.S.H"- Pray Until Something Happen!

I know I have to keep the faith. I know I have to more stronger. I need a lot of support and prayers right now. GOSH! Pray for me!!

" My 1st Blog On Year 2006 "

It is Year 2006 now.

I haven't been fired. Still have my job ;)

Well, What can i say? Time really flies so fast. Remember when I was a kid, I used to think that the world would end at year 2000; that Jesus would come again. To get His children you know. Hmm.. If He did, I'd probrably end up in hell. Haha! Just thinking what was I way back year 2000 would really end me up in hell. Good thing Jesus waited for me till 2004. Yipeee!!

I really don't know what would happen to me in the future. I don't know if my future is in Taiwan, or is it back in Manila... I'm praying that God would lead me to the way He wanted me to walk. There are times I would really ask God why I'm not with my sister and my brother, like when are we three be together you know, just like a family. But on the other side, I really can feel that it is not yet time to go home. For example, If my mom ask me to go home this year, I would really feel weird. I'd feel not yet time. Actually, I'm not really in a hurry to go home, I'm planning to go home next year probrably. I'm really getting myself prepared. You know, Family & relatives are not Christians. I'm praying and hoping that I'd make a difference in their lives when I go back home for good. I know that God would make useful of me in every way. Amen! ;)